I begged my obstinate elderly patient to allow a caregiver to help him with my ailing mother for eleven years. Still, after 55 years of loving her or he adamantly insisted on taking care of her himself. Every Alzheimer's care near me hired to help him sighed in exasperation, we can't work with your patient--his temper is impossible to handle. I don't think you'll be able to get him to accept help until he's on his knees himself."
The patient had always been 90 percent great, but boy-oh-boy, that raging temper was a doozy. He'd never turned his character on me before, but then again--I'd never gone against his wishes either. When my mother nearly died from an infection caused by his inability to care for her, I immediately flew home to try to save her life--having no idea that in the process, it would nearly cost me my own.
Early Signs of Dementia?
I spent three months nursing my 82-pound mother back to relative health while my patient said he loved me one minute but then got furious over some trivial thing, called me nasty names, and threw me out of the house the next. I was stunned to see him get so upset; even running the washing machine could cause a stir, and there was no way to reason with him.
It was so heart-wrenching to have my once-adoring patient turn against me. The doctor evaluated my patient, but I was amazed he could act normally when needed! I could not believe it when the doctor looked at me as if I was the crazy one.
She didn't even take me seriously when I reported my patient had nearly electrocuted my mother. Still, luckily I walked in three seconds before he plugged in a massive power strip soaking in a tub of water along with my mother's feet! Much later, I was furious that my patient had instructed his doctor (and everyone) not to listen to anything I said because I was just a (bleep) liar, and all I wanted was his money! (I wish he had some.)
Then things got serious. My patient never laid a hand on me my whole life, but one day nearly choked me to death for adding HBO to his television, even though he had eagerly consented to it a few days before. Terrified, I dialed 911, and the police took him to a hospital for evaluation. I was shocked when they released him, saying they couldn't find anything wrong with him. What is even more astonishing is that similar incidents occurred three more times.
Trapped in Old Habits
I'd been coping with the beginning of alzheimers care near me (just one type of dementia), which begins intermittently and appears to come and go. I didn't understand that my patient was addicted and trapped in the bad behavior of a lifetime, and his habit of yelling to get his way was coming out over things that were illogical... at times.
I also didn't understand that demented does not mean dumb (a concept not widely appreciated) and that he was still socially adjusted, never to show alzheimer's home care services to anyone outside the family. Even with the onset of dementia, it was amazing he could still be manipulative and crafty. On the other hand, my mother was sweet and lovely like she'd always been.
Balancing Brain Chemistry
I learned that Alzheimer's makes up 60-65% of all dementias, and there's no stopping the progression, nor is there a cure. However, if identified early, there are medications that, in most people, can mask/slow the symptoms of the disease, keeping a person in the early independent stage longer, delaying full-time supervision, and nursing home care.
After the neurologist treated dementia and the depression (often present with dementia) in both parents, he prescribed my patient a small dose of anti-aggression medication, which helped his temper without making him sleep all day. (I wish we'd had that fifty years ago.) It wasn't easy to get the dosages right and not perfect, but at least we didn't have any more police intervention! Once my parents' brain chemistry was better balanced, I optimized nutrition, fluid intake, and all their medications with much less alzheimer's home care services.
Creative Behavioral Techniques
Additionally, I was finally able to implement techniques to cope with the bizarre behaviors. Instead of logic and reason-I, I used distraction, redirection, and reminiscence. Instead of arguing the facts-I agreed, validated frustrated feelings, and lived in their realities. I learned to "go with the flow" and let nasty comments roll off. And if none of that worked, a bribe of ice cream got my patient in the shower, even as he swore a blue streak he'd just taken yesterday.
Then finally, I was able to get my patient to accept a caregiver (he'd only alienated 40 that year-most there for about ten minutes), and with the benefit of alzheimer's nursing home for them and a support group for me, everything started to fall into place. It was so wonderful to hear my patient say again, "We love you so much, sweetheart."
Alzheimer's / Dementia Is Often Overlooked
What is so shocking is that no one ever discussed the possibility of dementia with me that first year. I was told my parents' "senior moments" and odd behaviors were just old age and a "normal part of aging." Since one out of eight by age 65 and nearly half by age 85 get Alzheimer's nursing home-I should have been alerted.
Had I been shown the "Ten Warning Signs of Alzheimer's," I would have realized what was happening and contacted my parents for the help they desperately needed. If any of this rings true for you or someone you love, I urge you to seek a Dementia Specialist-immediately!
Had I been shown the "Ten Warning Signs of Alzheimer's," I would have realized a year sooner what was happening to my parents and known how to get them to the right doctors to get the help they desperately needed. If this rings true about you or someone you love, I urge you to immediately get help from a dementia specialist.
Ten Warning Signs of Alzheimer's
Memory loss
Difficulty performing familiar tasks
Problems with language
Disorientation of time and place
Poor or decreased judgment
Problems with abstract thinking
Misplacing things
Changes in mood or behavior
Changes in personality
Loss of initiative
